I came!! My orgasms are back... Oh my god what a relief. I came last Wednesday. I was alone at home, i had the morning off work and woke up horny. I had been feeling horny for a few days, occasionally at work nipping to the toilet, hitching up my skirt (i always wear hold ups, so much more convenient) and rubbing my cunt through my thong to take the edge off. Sometimes i get so sensitive down there to put direct pressure on my clit is too much and i find it better to have the barrier of the flimsy material of my knickers as a kind of protection. i love that feeling of soaking wet material against my cunt and a gust of wind blowing up my skirt.. i swear there have been times I've almost cum just walking down the street, or getting on the train - for some reason at the DART station there's always a good cross wind.
I have 2 very different but 2 equally strong sides to me. Its exhausting trying to figure out which is the real me as i don't think that both can live in harmony.
My light Side:
I'm the girl next door type. I work hard, i pay my bills, i try to always do "the right thing". I'm in my late 20's, and the big 30 is looming. I feel pressure to settle down, to find a good honest hardworking man, to get married, start a family, buy a house... don't get me wrong, i want all that, i really do..
but then there's....
My dark side:
Granted my dark side is most active and takes over when I'm horny but in saying that up until 2 weeks ago that was every fucking minute of every day for months.. Its draining being horny constantly. My dark side craves to be used, to be a whore, to be fucked, degraded, humiliated.. To be told what a cock sucking fuck toy i am.. i crave to be slapped, fucked, tied up. i need to be someone's 3 hole fuck toy.
Can i be a Madonna and whore all in one?
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3 comments:
"Can i be a Madonna and whore all in one?"
SURE! Even a nice girl like Madonna has needs (Madonna IS a nice girl .... is'nt she???). Maybe its just that you need a partner/s who will give you permission to express your naughty dark evil side? That's what Ms. Whiplash told me, and she must know!
Anyway, God alone knows what he and the original Madonna got up to in their time. Hey! They invented original sinning! Tut tut ...
I think you can be both...but the most important thing is to find what will make you happy. I thought i wanted the marriage, kids, etc. and got all of it..I had a beautiful house, car, kids, husband...but I wasn't happy. I wasn't being true to myself...it took me until my late 30's to realize that something was missing...now I feel more complete and myself than ever and most people would not agree..I am moving across the country to be with my Master....to start a completely different life...and I am ecstatic! You can be whatever you want AWS!!!! Find your bliss!
Cormac i think your very right, i do need a partner that i am free to express my dark side with. Someone who will push me but not judge.
slavegirl - I'm so happy for you that you have found what you were looking for. I'm just being a spoilt bitch and want both, even if it is with different people.
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