What is a Masochist

I never considered myself a Masochist, not in the true sense of the word. Yes I get off on some pain during sex and play but nothing hard core. Spanking, rough nipple play is about as bad as it gets... but is physical pain the only pain to be the definition of a masochist? I looked up the meaning and it seems not -

mas·och·ism
"gratification gained from pain, deprivation, degradation, etc., inflicted or imposed on oneself, either as a result of one's own actions or the actions of others, esp. the tendency to seek this form of gratification."

Today i realised i am a masochist, not in the form of physical pain but more emotion. No matter how much that man(Mr. X) hurts me, crushes me, sends me to the deepest despair, I still keep going back to me. i spent 2 weeks crying over him.. why? He couldn't care less about me, I know this and yet i still keep going back for more... I need help!